Your guide to a healthier perspective of life
“Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.” – George Washington
People are often incentivized to do nothing (or worse, to do the wrong thing) by being rewarded. Meanwhile, they are often hurt (financially, socially, etc.) by doing the right thing. The question is, do you have the intestinal fortitude to do what is right, no matter the consequences?
There are trade-offs in everything you do. It’s called opportunity cost. Because you are spending your time, energy, or money on one thing, that means that you cannot spend that same time, energy, or money on something else. You do not have an infinite supply, therefore your actions are costing you the opportunity to do something else. You must choose what your priority is and focus on that. Take this into account when making daily decisions. You don’t always have to make the most efficient or effective choice, but if you regularly decide to practice inefficiency and ineffectiveness, it will eventually catch up to you.
One process to combat this is called the Kaizen method. Kaizen focuses on applying small, daily changes that result in major improvements over time. Thought about in another way, if you can improve yourself even fractionally (.5%, for example) each day, imagine how much better you’ll be in 5, 10, or 15 years.
The opposite is also true. If you get just a little worse each day, you won’t be able to tell at first. But after getting fractionally worse over a period of 10 years, you’re going to look in the mirror and wonder what happened to yourself.
Don’t be the person who peaked in high school. Understand that there are trade-offs in every decision you make and try to improve in something each day.
Jocko Willink (former Navy Seal Lieutenant Commander) says, “Discipline equals freedom.” It seems counterintuitive, but if you think about it, it’s really not. Discipline will bring you success, which will give you freedom from the rat race of life. It’s the great separator between you and most other people. If you are able to be disciplined, you are able to do the hard things when you don’t want to. Most people will choose the easy route, but not you.
Because of your discipline, you are able to get up early, to challenge your mind, to get a good workout in, to cook healthy meals, to save more money, to be a better parent, to be a better employee/employer. Because of your discipline, you can set a goal and achieve it. You can accomplish so much more when you are disciplined, which will actually free your future self (as opposed to making decisions in the present day that ultimately enslaves your future self to working a job you don’t like for a paycheck).
Are you disciplined? You can be if you want to be. But you have to remain focused. You have to believe in yourself and you have change what you tell yourself. If you say that you’re not disciplined, you won’t be. Identify yourself as someone who does hard things and you will become that person.
When you’re in charge of training someone, the only thing you can do is give them an opportunity to perform. You can show them what is required to thrive in their specific role – what they need to do, best practices, etc. – but you can’t make them do it. You can spend hours explaining the tactics of a position, but you can’t teach someone to have passion, to be curious, or to have a better work ethic. But if they don’t want to do it, or if they just don’t understand/aren’t picking it up quickly enough, you can’t force them to do what you would do. If it’s not working, eventually you will have to do something about it.
Be careful to not make an emotional decision about this. Be objective, but be kind. Are they just not doing something the way that you would do it, but they’re still getting the job done? Is their performance still acceptable? Are they making big enough strides where, even though they aren’t where you need them to be right now, they’re on their way to becoming what you need from them?
After you remove emotions and give their work an honest evaluation, talk with others who know the situation. Make sure you emphasize that they give you their true opinions about the work being completed by the person in question. It’s not about the individual. It should always be about the work and how it affects those around them. Many people are careful to criticize because they like the person they are evaluating or because they fear the other person will find out. But if they don’t let their true feelings be known, they are doing a disservice to the company and even to the individual. After all, maybe this isn’t what the individual wants. Maybe it’s not fulfilling for them and that is why they are not putting in the extra effort to learn and excel at their craft.
Ultimately, you must determine if you’ve done everything in your power (as the trainer/mentor) to help that person succeed. Do they only need to make a few adjustments or is it time to move on? Did you lead them to water? If so, it’s up to them to decide to drink…
Life is short. Life is long. Both statements are true. Use them to your advantage instead of using them as an excuse. What do I mean?
Life is short when you think of our lifespan versus the span of our universe. We shouldn’t waste our time here focusing on things that don’t matter. Yes, we all need money to survive, but are you suffering in other areas because your sole focus is money? After all, we can’t take it with us when we die.
Are you sacrificing time with family, working on your health (mental, physical, spiritual), or letting relationships disintegrate because you choose not to go out to eat with friends or you’re stuck at the office again? Life is meant to be experienced. Go out and have an adventure. Even if it’s not a two week vacation to an exotic location, you can still take “micro adventures” nearby. Can you just go for a day hike, camp in your backyard, or do a ropes course? Can you go to a museum or go four wheeling somewhere? It doesn’t have to be expensive to be meaningful and create lasting memories. Life is short, so go make the most of it.
But guess what?
Life is long.
What??? Didn’t I just go over why life is short? YOLO, right? Well, yes and no. You still need to be responsible and play the long game. It feels good to eat pizza and ice cream, to sleep in, binge watch the latest show, and go on a spending spree. But if that’s your everyday life, the next thing you know, you’ll wake up and it will be ten years later with you weighing 50 lbs more than you ever have, not having challenged yourself or used your brain in a meaningful way, and be up to your eyeballs in debt.
Hopefully you’ll live for a long time. But to live your best future life, more often than not, you’ll need to delay doing what feels good today. You will have to eat right, go workout, read a book occasionally, spend less money than you make and invest the rest. Life is long. Don’t get caught up in hurting your future self by only thinking about what your present self wants.
Just like everything in life, you have to find balance. Find the balance between living for today and setting yourself up for the future. If you go all in on one or the other, you’re much more likely to regret your decisions.