Parable of the two wolves…

There are several versions of “The Tale of Two Wolves,” but the one I’m most familiar goes something like this…

“We each have two wolves inside of us. We have a negative wolf and a positive wolf, and they fight on a daily basis. Which wolf wins the most? The one you feed…the wolf you feed grows stronger with each meal, while the other slowly gets weaker.”

Feed the positive wolf. Don’t be a Debbie downer. Don’t be Eeyore. That negative attitude/energy is contagious and will spread to everyone around you. It is like the plague and once it gets going, it’s hard to stop.

Be the positive force that you need to be to create or sustain a positive team. You only have control over your actions/beliefs, but your actions, beliefs, and attitudes have the ability to influence others.

You also have the choice of who you spend time with. If you are in a toxic environment, get out! You wouldn’t keep a cancerous growth because you’ve been with it since the beginning or because you think it will change its ways. It’s a cancer! And it needs to be removed immediately. Cut out those negative influences from your life and you will live a happier life. Get rid of the drama.

Time, Repetition, and Mastery

Repetition builds mastery. How can you expect to be good at something, let alone great at something, if you only practice it every once in a while? Can you master anything if you do it once per week, month, or year? No way. And the more difficult the task at hand, the more effort needs to be put it in master it.

Are you willing to invest the time and effort needed to become a top producer in your career field (or whatever happens to be your goal)? If it takes 10,000 hours to master something (as Malcolm Gladwell suggests), how can we get to that requisite time more quickly? 40 hour work weeks x 50 work weeks per year = 2,000 hours. So you would need to do this for 5 years to master it. Can you study, read, or experience more to shortcut this time though?

Everybody wants to be the best. Everybody considers themselves above average. But there is a difference between saying you want something and meaning it. If you truly mean it, you’ll spend those extra hours working at improving your craft. And while you probably won’t see an immediate return on investment, the incremental improvements will compound over time and eventually get you to where you want to be.

To master anything, you need time to do it and practice reps to get you there.

Look for the silver lining

Look for the good in every person and in every situation. When you “judge” those around you, you are missing the point. Everyone has their own strengths and their own weaknesses. More than likely, they have different strengths than you. This is fantastic – especially in a work environment.

If everyone at your company had the same strengths and the same weaknesses, your company’s potential would be limited, as everyone would excel (or fail) at the same thing. But if your co-worker could save you from your weaknesses, and you from theirs, the team suddenly fills the gaps. Where there was a chink in the armor, now there is none.

If you focus on what someone else is lacking, you are not doing the team any justice. What you focus on gets amplified. So if that person is “bad” at something, and that’s all you focus on, that’s all you’re going to see. Never mind the fact that they’re probably much better than you in other areas – you’re just choosing not to see those aspects.

Instead of trying to find out where someone else is deficient, try to look within. Where are you lacking? What can you improve?

It is important to understand where you are weak (maybe even conducting a S.W.O.T. test for yourself – finding your strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats). That’s for you. But when dealing with others, you should be optimistic, have a good attitude, and to encourage those around you to be better, not to tear them down.

Focus on what you need to do to improve/help the team and less on what other team members are doing or not doing. Learning how to do this will leave you less frustrated as the days progress.

Job security

Bring value to the team. If you are worth more money than what you’re costing the company, act in accordance with the company’s core values, and keep a positive attitude/are pleasant to be around, you should always have a spot on that team if you want it.

How can you go from just having job security to being indispensable? Do work that nobody else is willing or able to do. Go above and beyond what’s listed in your job description. If you’re proactive and help solve company problems/issues without being prompted to, and you continuously do this, you will soon find yourself earning raises and rising in the ranks.

Go find the inefficiencies at your workplace and strive to eliminate those. You don’t have to suggest broad, sweeping changes (those can be viewed as risky), but if you tweak certain aspects of your job to make it easier, it could go a long way with your boss.

Unwarranted anxiety

“I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.” – Quote attributed to Mark Twain and Winston Churchill

We often build narratives in our head that cause us to feel anxious. We think to ourselves, “why would that person say that about me? They must have done it because of ______.” But, in reality, they may have never given it any thought. You played it up in your head to be some big deal when it’s not.

Don’t stress over scenarios which have never happened, and probably won’t happen. That’s not to say that you shouldn’t think of potential outcomes or fallback solutions, but remember, a lot of troubles that we bring upon ourselves are all in our head.