mindset | The Caleb Barney Collection

Focus is the key to progress, not balance

“To make progress, you must be FOCUSED, NOT BALANCED.” ⁃ Robert Kiyosaki

You can make a little progress while loving a balanced life, but to make the biggest gains, you have to focus an inordinate amount of attention on one specific goal or task. When you focus on one thing, you’ll be amazed at the strides you can make.

There is no such thing as a perfectly balanced life. Our lives are more like waves in the ocean, going back and forth. Sometimes we have a big project with a deadline to meet, so we have to put our energy in that, while other times we have the ability to focus more on our family, our health, etc.

We can try to be perfectly balanced, but will most likely frustrate you as you aim for the impossible. Instead, spend time in great focus on one aspect of life while maintaining other aspects, then ebb and flow to the next major category.

Being bored is a good thing

We need silence for creativity. We need to be ok being bored. In today’s world, it is so easy to try to avoid being bored at all costs. Whether we are listening to the radio, a podcast, an audiobook, watching TV, playing video games, reading, hanging out with others, the list goes on and on. But sometimes we just need to be by ourselves and not have anything on to distract us. It’s during the quiet times that we will often come up with the best ideas.

Think about what is causing you the most trouble or pain. Now think of ways to minimize that pain, not by avoiding it, but by eliminating it. This will not only increase your happiness, but if it’s a common problem for many people, it could actually improve others’ lives too.

Slow down when reading

“To read without reflecting is like eating without digesting.” – Edmund Burke

I used to do exactly this. In my conquest for self-improvement, I tried to consume as much information as quickly as possible. Podcasts and audiobooks on 1.5x speed, trying to read as many physical books as I could within a given time period, watching YouTube videos relevant to my field of study, etc.

But what I unintentionally missed was that, if I didn’t slow down and contemplate on what I just read, I didn’t dig deep enough to truly understand the whole idea. I understood basic concepts and surface level ideas, but couldn’t clearly articulate them. If you want to master something, you have to know it inside and out. And if you’re only going for volume/high quantity, you’re missing out on the true knowledge (quality). Dig deeper to understand more. Question what you read, don’t take it at face value. Play devil’s advocate. What would someone who supports that idea say? What would someone who disagrees with that idea say? What evidence is there to verify this idea and was that evidence cherry-picked or is it an accurate reflection of the truth?

The point here is to not rush to check another book off of your reading list. Slow down. If you’re reading to learn, then do it right the first time. Take your time, read, reflect, question, answer, discuss, and continue reading.

On conflict…

Don’t go seeking conflict and confrontation, but don’t be afraid of it either. Both extremes are not good. Have a back bone and stand up for what you believe in, but do it tactfully and respectfully as to keep the negotiation going. If you shut a conversation or idea down, you’re treating it as a win-lose situation. That may be necessary for some things (hostage negotiations, for example), but if you want to have a long, meaningful relationship with that person there needs to be some “give and take.” If you always win (or lose), eventually that other person won’t want to deal with you anymore.

Getting out of your comfort zone

Most of the best things in life happen at the edges of your comfort zone. If you only want to feel comfort, you’ll be less likely to branch out/try new things, to overcome adversity, learn new skill sets, etc.

The higher degree of difficulty, the less comfortable most people are with trying to tackle that problem. If you’re willing (and able) to solve that problem, and if you can find a way to solve the problem for others too, you often are compensated (monetarily) for it. Most people want to stay in their comfort zones and are willing to trade money for comfort (paying someone else to solve their problems). There’s nothing wrong with this. We all do it, and depending on the stage of life we’re in, it may be a smarter financial decision to pay an expert/specialist to do something more efficiently so you’re not wasting your non-renewable resource (time) on something you don’t know how to do well and will end up with a worse finished product than if the expert did it in the first place.

Life will only change when you become more committed to your dreams than you are to your comfort zone.