mindset | The Caleb Barney Collection

Three success factors

To achieve optimum success, one needs to have the ability, work ethic, and luck. One of these is in our control, while the other two are (mostly) not.

Take ability, for example. Some people are born with an innate ability or have the physical characteristics to be more prone to succeed in certain arenas. LeBron James was built to be a superstar athlete. No matter how much work ethic or luck I have, I don’t have the same natural gift/ability that he has. Not many people do. But there have been other athletes who were just as talented as LeBron and who haven’t achieved his level of success. This is because LeBron optimizes his natural ability by also having an incredible work ethic.

This leads to the next success factor, which is work ethic. Work ethic is the only thing we have complete control over. Every morning we wake up, we make the decision on how we want to use our day. When we’re at work, are we actually working or are we scrolling through social media or reading espn? Do we casually going through the day or do we have a plan? Set our intentions for each day. What is the one thing we need to do in each area of our lives (mental, physical, spiritual, relational, financial, and vocational) to get us closer to our goals? Are we living intentionally?

Lastly, the success factor with the biggest variation – luck. Some people seem to have great luck while others have “bad” luck. But while some of what we experience is “luck of the draw,” a lot of times there are little things we can do to better position ourselves. If we have a good attitude, and are a great team player, we generally will have more luck. If we share our goals with other people and are likable, other people will want to help us when they can. But they can’t help us unless they know what we’re aiming for. And they won’t help us if they don’t like us. So be kind to everyone, be generous, be curious, have a good work ethic, contribute to a positive culture, and be willing to be vulnerable. Take calculated risks (preferably asymmetric risks, where the cost is low, but the potential reward is high).

Being curious leads to better results

Ask more questions, but ask better questions too. You already know what you think you know. Your goal should be to understand what other people know (or think they know). What can you learn from them? But don’t pester them with annoying questions.

Be curious. The more curious you are, the faster you’ll learn and grow as a person. And, hey, some additional perks are you’ll probably have some great conversations and grow stronger friendships too.

Facing adversity to minimize entitlement

The sooner you can allow your children to experience adversity, the better off they will be. Ideally, they should face small problems/hurdles to overcome, with the hurdles gradually increasing as they are able to mentally and physically overcome them.

If you shield them from every pain, if you protect them from ever receiving negative feedback, they won’t be able to withstand even the slightest pain when they grow up. Imagine how embarrassing it will be when they are eight years old and still don’t know how to share toys/games. Or when they cry for not getting their way when they are nine. Imagine them being a poor sport when they lose a game because you always let them win.

They need to understand rejection, defeat, and not always getting their way. If you always cave in to every request (candy, buying them games, etc), they will expect life to do the same. But that’s not how life works and they will be in for a rude awakening when they finally figure that out. That’s why so many people who are entitled. They think they deserve something just because they are them. They weren’t taught proper manners and expectations at a younger age and have brought a child’s mindset to adolescence (and beyond).

Power, choice, and feelings

Don’t let others’ words control how you feel or react.

I saw this quote on LinkedIn and decided that I wanted to talk about it a little more. I completely agree with this sentiment…

If you allow other people’s words or actions determine if you are happy, sad, mad, or anything in between, you’re in for a roller coaster of emotions in life. You can’t control what they say or do, and if you react to everything, you’re giving them the power to “make” you feel a certain way.

But the truth is, only you get to decide whether or not you feel happy or not. Keep that power for yourself – do not give it away to others who may or may not be thinking about how their actions might affect you physically or psychologically.

Practice what Viktor Frankl (Holocaust survivor, neurologist, psychiatrist, philosopher, and author) called SPR – Stimulus, Pause, Response. He said, “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” Be free. Choose to be happy or choose to be mad. But make sure it is you who is making that choice, and not someone else choosing for you.

Thinking about diversification

Does diversification really make sense? I used to think, of course it makes sense! When you diversify, you are spreading out (aka minimizing) your potential risk. But you’re also minimizing your potential reward. So now, my thinking is…maybe. I think it depends on your level of knowledge in what you’re investing in.

Diversification for the novice investor can be thought of as risk mitigation, but for the expert in their field, instead of putting all of their eggs in the basket they know best, they would be putting some eggs in that basket and some in other baskets which they have limited information/knowledge on how to properly optimize their return on investment. An analogy would be to consider a generalist versus a specialist. A generalist might be a jack of all trades, but a master of none, just as diversifying your portfolio makes you “good” in several areas, but not excellent in any. This is because you have spread yourself too thin to truly become an expert in one area.

For the novice investor (which I am, so no judgement is being passed here), I think diversification makes sense. But if you are an expert in your field and you know something better than 99% of the population, why would you reduce your investment where you have an informational advantage? Does it really make sense to invest in things that you don’t know as well just so you are diversified?

Does a top-tier athlete try to go pro in multiple sports or do they eventually select one and try to be the best at that? When you are starting a business, will you get as far by trying to do a little bit of everything and serving every type of client or does it make sense to niche down and become the “go-to” person/business for one specific type of client? That’s where the saying comes from, “when everyone is your customer, nobody is.” You don’t differentiate yourself from your competitors who have either become the experts in their field or who have the name brand recognition and can afford to spread their resources thin.