The “better” man or woman isn’t the one who is always right (which, by the way, is impossible, as nobody is always right). The “better” man or woman is the one who is able to admit when they are wrong and to take corrective actions.
Nobody is perfect. I’d like to think that most people are good and they want what’s best for everyone, but with a bias towards what also helps them the most.
Our thinking is skewed by our past. Whatever has happened to us previously, or what is happening to us now, any hardships we’ve faced and either defeated or were overcome by, the friends we are surrounded with, those are the things that affect our views in life. So while I may disagree with you, it is because of the experiences that have shaped my life. I haven’t walked a mile in your shoes just like you haven’t done the same in mine. What is most important is that we be respectful of each other’s opinions. We can try to persuade someone else, but ultimately, it is up to them to decide what they want/how they feel. The only thing you should really focus on is trying to be open-minded.
It takes a bigger person to try to understand someone else as opposed to trying to silence them. And who knows? Maybe by understanding others, you’ll be willing to change your mind along the way.
Don’t fall into the trap of only keeping track of your outcomes. It is important to note the difference between the work you put in leading up to the outcome and the outcome itself. What I mean by this is that no matter what you do to prepare for a certain event, there will always be luck involved which is out of your control. For example, you could know the probability that something will occur “X” percent of the time (like a poker hand) and be a relatively good predictor of that thing actually happening. But no matter how much information you have, you have no control over the amount of luck (in your favor or against you) which will occur.
Say you’re playing Texas Hold’em. You’re dealt pocket aces (two of the highest cards) to start the hand. Unless one of your opponents has the other two aces in the deck, you always are starting out with the higher probability of winning before any other cards are shown. But say you lose with that starting hand 3 times in a row. Would you vow to never play pocket aces again, even though statistically you are favored to win? No. That would be valuing the outcome over the process.
The processes you follow should be based on what gives you the best chance to achieve your goals. It may not always work in your favor, but if you are always putting yourself in position to succeed, more often than not, you will.
Measure your processes, not the outcomes. If the outcomes always seem to be going against you, test your assumptions about the processes (maybe you’re missing something). And be sure to not only dwell on the negative outcomes (it’s easier to remember something bad that has happened as opposed to the many good things that have occurred).
For diet and exercise, don’t stress out if you don’t get everything you want done in a single day. Think about it in big picture terms. No single day is going to make or break you. It’s the accumulation of making the right decisions (good habits) that will get you to where you want to go.
When tracking what micronutrients you want to consume or what muscle groups you want to target, aim for a weekly average. Yes, you will need to break that down into what it equates to per day, but as long as you fit it in throughout the course of the week and you hit your weekly goals consistently, you should be ok.
Do what is manageable/sustainable for you and forgive yourself when you mess up. Instead of beating yourself up when missing a goal, get back on track as quickly as possible (with the next thing you eat or your next workout). Reduce barriers to what you want to achieve, develop good habits, and repeat.
Do hard things daily. Challenge your body by working out. Challenge your mind by reading and writing. Challenge your beliefs by being receptive to ideas from others who don’t have the same opinions as you. Take on that difficult project at work. Say no to eating out today and make something from a new recipe instead.
Experience voluntary hardship. It makes actual hardships easier and it puts life into perspective. Life is good. We just fail to properly appreciate it.
“In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.” – Albert Einstein.
Albert Einstein has been attributed with saying, “In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.” I don’t know the context in which he was speaking, but that’s almost irrelevant, as the statement applies to nearly every situation.
Whenever you encounter difficulties/challenges/obstacles/hardships, whenever you are frustrated by something, there is an opportunity for you to improve yourself or to improve the situation. It’s like when you hit rock bottom, the only way to go is up. Sure, most people aren’t at rock bottom, so the situation could possibly get worse as well, but if you are cognizant of your surroundings, your mindset, and the actions you are taking (or not taking), you can usually find a way to make things better.
Another way to think of it (especially when it comes to frustration at work) is that if it was easy to correct, everyone would do it and the solution would be devalued. Your worth to an employer would decrease, because if they could pay a teenage kid with no education in that specific field to do it at a cheaper cost, they would. Or if the data could be plugged into an algorithm and a robot could use artificial intelligence to solve the problem, you would be out of a job. So, the next time you get irritated by your work not going as smoothly as you want, follow these simple steps…
First, try to figure out what went wrong then stop doing that. Where did things go south? Was it something within your control? Then do something different. Was it something someone else did? See if you can walk alongside them and work through the issue with them so it doesn’t happen again.
Second, develop systems/standard operating procedures so next time a situation like that occurs, there is a manual for you (or someone on your team) to refer to without wasting too much brain power. Tweak this as you get more information and follow the results.
Third, be thankful that your work can be challenging. Humans need to overcome challenges to feel satisfied. If it wasn’t challenging and you were bored out of your mind every day, you would eventually hate your job. And remember, if your job doesn’t require skill, you are expendable to the next cheapest laborer.
To summarize, use challenges as a learning experience of how to NOT do something, or if it causes enough pain/frustration to you and others, then work to capitalize on that by creating a better answer. Solve the problem to not only help yourself, but to help others too. The more people you help, the more you will be compensated. (This is what Matthew McConaughey recently discussed on The Tim Ferriss Show and The Joe Rogan Experience, referring to it as the egotistical utilitarian…Why shouldn’t you aim to do something that gets you what you want, but also helps others? That’s a win-win scenario.)
