Category: Uncategorized

Being true to yourself

I can’t change anyone’s mind. You can’t either. We can’t force others to change their thoughts or behaviors. We can only hope to influence these things with our words and our actions – by doing what we feel is right.

Don’t bury your head in the sand and hope that a problem goes away. Talk about it. Be open. Be vulnerable.

A lot of people don’t speak up because they fear they will lose their job, lose some of their social standing, maybe reduce their status among their peers… But really, what’s the worst that can happen? If you are punished when you stand up for something you believe in, it will be worth it. You may get some backlash from a select few, but you’ll get respect from others, and most importantly you can keep respect for yourself.

In the end, hopefully you’ll realize that chasing attention and admiration from others is a futile game. You have to work on keeping your dignity and respecting yourself. If you do that, you’ll live a good life.

Growth over comfort

Will you choose to be comfortable or to try to reach your potential?

Have you ever noticed that we make the most improvement when we are forced outside of our comfort zones? If that’s the case though, why aren’t we always pushing the limits of our comfort zones? It’s simple. It’s because we are creatures of comfort. Who doesn’t want to sleep in a warm, cozy bed? Or to not feel the pain of an intense workout? Of course we tend to stay within our comfort zones – it’s easier!

This is not to say that you always have to be going 100 mph in every area of your life, because at that rate you’re bound to burn out. But in order to move from average, mediocre, or good enough, to excellence, you can’t be complacent. Jim Collins said, “Good is the enemy of great. That’s why so few things become great.” Isn’t that the truth? So often we do just enough to get by – we’re ok with good, so we don’t push to be great. Good is comfortable. Great is difficult.

As I was reading the other day, I came across this quote by Benjamin Mays. He said, “The tragedy of life is often not in our failure, but rather in our complacency; not in our doing too much, but rather in our doing too little; not in our living above our ability, but rather in our living below our capacities.” It echoes the same sentiment that Jim Collins describes above. We all have so much potential that we never live up to. Make sure you don’t waste your time here by not pursuing your dreams.

I’d rather fail trying than to never have tried at all. We will stumble when we have lofty goals. We’ll be uncomfortable at times. But remember, there is no growth without discomfort.

Doing the right thing, always

You build resilience by encountering and overcoming difficult situations. You build character by the choices you make when the going gets tough.

It is easy to do the right thing in times of peace. But when you’re being challenged? That’s when you need to step up.

Think about the long-term ramifications of your decision and if you will be proud of what you’re about to say or do. The same can be said of your inaction as well. Will you be able to look back and be proud by not doing something?

Hindsight is 20-20. We all wish we could have said something or done something different at some point in our lives. Try not to make today one of those days.

Listen to understand

Listen to understand, don’t listen to reply. Don’t just wait for your turn to speak. That’s why the best conversations go with the flow. Sure, there may be some go-to questions that refer to if the conversation hits a lull, but if you only ask what’s on your question sheet, your talk will seem more like an interrogation instead of a conversation.

Having a team to go far

I’ve always enjoyed the quote, “if it is to be, it’s up to me.” This implies that if you want something done, you have to take action to put yourself in the position to get it. YOU have the power to change your life. It may take a while, and it may never come to fruition, but it will NEVER happen if you don’t do something about it. But this quote is very self-centered and, in my eyes, incomplete.

Recently, I read one of Gary Keller’s books and he modifies the quote slightly to, “If I want it to be, it starts with me.” At first, I didn’t think anything of it. It is changed a little from the initial quote, but I attributed the change more to an accidental misquote – almost like how the message always seems to change just a little from person-to-person when playing a game of telephone. But after giving it more thought, they really are different ideas. With Gary’s quote, it still says that if you want something to happen, you have to be the catalyst of change. I agree with this. But what Gary’s quote implies is that change only starts with you. If you have big enough goals, you’ll never be able to do everything by yourself. You’ll need to build a team around you.

This brings me to the last quote of the day, an African proverb, which states, “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” You can move very quickly if you’re working alone because you don’t have to take time to try to influence others why your idea is best for the company. You can pivot at a moment’s notice when you’re working alone, not bogged down with bureaucracy. But you will eventually reach your capacity, whether it’s your time, financial, emotional, physical, mental, etc. We all have limits as individuals, but if you construct a team to “fill the gaps” where you are weak, you can prevail over those limitations! If you have a team of all stars to help overcome your capacities, you can achieve huge goals that you never could have by yourself.

So, instead of trying to be a superhero, doing everything yourself, work to build a team around you to reach the really lofty goals. It will eventually save you time and frustration, and if you enjoy their company, you will have some fun along the way.