The popular thing to say is to stop comparing yourself to others. I agree with that to a degree. It should not be your primary focus. You need to measure your performance by asking yourself if you did the best you could. After all, if I compared my three-point shooting to Steph Curry’s, I would feel pretty bad about myself. But if I put in the dedicated practice everyday to get better, that’s all I could ask for.
But at a certain point, if you really want to become better, you have to measure your performance against others. Competition brings out the best in you. Otherwise it’s too easy to get complacent. It’s almost like when you’re working out. Your body can go a lot further than you let it, if only you allowed yourself to really open up/push yourself. But if you’re only working out by yourself, it’s easy to take your foot off the gas pedal. Plus, if you’re never around people who are better than you at something, how will you know what is possible? If they can do something, so can you. You just have to work for it.
So, yes…you shouldn’t primarily be focusing on comparing yourself or your situation to others. BUT that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t look around to find motivation to better yourself. If you’re the best at “X” then you need to find others who can push you to new limits.