Mindset and expectations

It sounds weird saying it, but focus on what you have, not on what you don’t have. If you continually think of what you’re missing (not just for material “things,” but what a friend, coworker, or family member may be lacking, whether it be in mental fortitude, financial aptitude, etc), that becomes your main focus. You could have a great relationship where 90%+ of everything you’ve ever wanted is right in front of you and you could be happy about it, or you can focus on the last 10% and be upset. Nobody is perfect, including you, so don’t put your relationships with others, or put the possession of a material object, on a pedestal.

Your ideal version of the relationship is not realistic. Owning an item will not make you happy in the long term. It’s ok to dream, to share your dreams, and to work on them with others. But, at the end of the day, just remember that you can’t make anyone change and that you can’t buy happiness (via purchasing a material item). You can only change two things: yourself and your attitude. 

One last thing to leave you with…I’ve heard Tim Ferris’s quote this “equation” before and found it to be useful.

Happiness = Reality – Expectations

If you set realistic expectations, oftentimes reality will coincide with them, and you will be happy. If you expect things to go perfectly according to plan, you will often find yourself feeling frustrated when your reality does not meet your expectations.