advice | The Caleb Barney Collection

Smart debt versus dumb debt

If you’re buying an asset that makes you more money (whether through appreciation, cash flow/dividends, or tax benefits) than it costs to borrow (paying down your principal and interest while more than keeping pace with inflation), you can make a legitimate argument to go into debt to invest in that asset.

If you’re going into debt to buy something that doesn’t make you money, you’re giving into your inner child.

Only borrow money to buy things that go up in value. Otherwise pay all cash for it or not at all.

Tomorrow is a new day

At the end of the day, you might have some regrets about what you did or didn’t do or what you said or didn’t say, but you have to let it go.

You can’t change that anymore.

The best thing you can do is to move on. If you feel bad about something, apologize or do something to make it right – don’t dwell on things you can’t change.

Half-baked thoughts: Varying levels of parenting

Levels of parenting:

1) Being a parent = Having a child.

2) Being a good parent = Taking care of your child/children.

3) Being a great parent = Taking care of yourself and your child/children.

It doesn’t take much to be a parent, but it does take a lot of time, effort, and sacrifice to be a good or great parent. The difference between good and great might not be what you think though…instead of giving more to your kids and never letting them struggle, I think a great parent lets their kids find things out on their own.

A great parent lays the foundation for their children – making them feel loved and safe, providing a roof over their heads, and giving them access to healthy foods. A great parent also teaches their kids manners, how to respect others and to be kind, and to have a good work ethic.

But a great parent is not a helicopter parent (or, a lawnmower parent). They don’t hover over their children – never letting their kids experience failure or disappointment. They also don’t clear a path for their children – making their lives so easy that they never experience struggle.

Lastly (at least for this post), a great parent takes care of themself as well as their children. They eat right, exercise their mind and body, and are financially responsible. They are there to serve as a role model for the kids, who inevitably will learn from the parent’s actions. This not only allows the parent to have their own time to recharge, but it also gives the kids some independence from their parents.

Everything is interconnected

Have you noticed how pushing yourself physically improves your mental strength? Or how challenging or positively stressing your mind can benefit you relationally and spiritually? And by taking care of all of those things somehow creates a better financial picture for you and your family?

Everything you do is interconnected. You may be focused on one aspect of your life (like physical health), only to realize the side effects it has in other areas. This is why it’s so important to start your day off right. I love the Miracle Morning for this reason. In it, Hal Elrod recommends to start off each day with S.A.V.E.R.S.

S.A.V.E.R.S. is an acronym that stands for silence, affirmations, visualization, exercise, reading, and scribing (writing). If you can wake up an extra half hour (or hour) early to do this, you can build momentum for the rest of your day. By doing this, you will have stimulated your mind and your body, while also giving you clarity on what you want/need to accomplish for the day. I often feel energized after doing this.

Once I’m done with the S.A.V.E.R.S., I make a healthy breakfast. I know that not everyone likes to eat breakfast, but I feel it’s the most important meal of the day, if only because it is when you have the most willpower to eat healthy (while also saving money and giving you the satisfaction knowing that you cooked that meal). If you skip breakfast, it’s too easy to buy fast food or to eat donuts at the office (hurting your wallet and your waistline). And once you start down that slippery slope, it’s hard to get back on track.

Figure out how you can continue to stack little wins throughout the day. It can feel overwhelming to win the day, month, or year. But when you put it into perspective to just take one small, positive action at a time, eventually they’ll add up to make you a healthier, happier person. And don’t forget, every decision you make is interconnected with a different part of your life. Never take that for granted.

Worry, fear, and anxiety

Worrying is like a rocking chair. It will give you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere.

“Worry won’t get you to where you want to go. Action is the only way…”

To me, the only potential benefit to worrying is that it might help you think of ways that things might go sideways, allowing you to plan your next move ahead of it. But if you just get good at thinking of all the angles ahead of time, putting a contingency plan in place, and then still take action, you’ll be better off.

Where people get in trouble is when they let their worries, fears, and anxiety take over. When they overthink a situation, it’s almost like they’re in quicksand and can’t move. But if they realize that many of their worries will never actually come to fruition, they’ll be better off.

Another way to think about fear is this…what do I really fear about this situation? In a worst case scenario, what is going to happen? Maybe someone will tell you no or you’ll be embarrassed. Well, get used to it. All successful people have been told “no” a lot in their lives. All successful people have had to take a chance (and often fail) to get to where they are.

Worrying is like a rocking chair. It will give you something to do (there’s always something we can be worried about), but it doesn’t get you anywhere.