Helicopter and lawnmower parents – STOP! You’re hurting your children!

Life is like a fight. In the beginning, we’re wearing one of those fat sumo suits where if we make a mistake or get knocked on our butt, it won’t hurt much.

As we progress through life, we slowly start increasing in levels of difficulty, risk, and pain. The mistakes we make run the risk of being more consequential to our lives. So after the sumo suit, maybe we are wearing headgear, training gloves, kneepads, etc. And when we get into junior high or high school, maybe we’re just wearing boxing gear. By the time we graduate college, we are now preparing for a world of bareknuckle boxing.

There will always be difficulties in life, but for the parents who try to clear a path and not let their kids ever fall or get hurt, they are actually doing them a disservice. Because when their kids get out into the real world and have to face other bareknuckle boxers, but they haven’t made it past their sumo suit training, they are going to be in a world of pain and not know what to do with it.

We need to build up our pain tolerance (and our children’s pain tolerance) by failing early and failing often. Life is not meant to be all rainbows and butterflies. We’re not only going to have sunny days. We need to encounter the dark days and know that we’ll make it through. It will help us overcome the challenges that inevitably come with living.

Think about that when you’re parenting. It sucks to watch your kid experience any sort of pain, whether that’s physical or emotional. But your job as a parent isn’t to make sure they never experience pain, it’s to make sure that they know how to respond to it and come back stronger.

Impact and self-worth

Don’t get your sense of self worth from what you do for money or how much you have of it. Instead, think of what value you bring to those around you.

How will others remember you when you die? If you were to ask everyone you know what 3 adjectives describe you, what would they say? Would you be happy with how others think of you or do you need to start living differently?

Your impact on others will be remembered far greater than how much money you earned or what you did professionally…

Making memories

“It doesn’t matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was.” – Anne Sexton.

My dad was a great man. I would say so and I believe that many other people would say so too. My dad passed away when I was just 28 years old, 4 months away from me becoming a first time father myself. He taught me many things in the 28 years that I was by his side. I attribute who I am today because of the values that my mother and father instilled in me from a young age. I will always remember him as one of the greatest men that I’ve ever known.

This brings me to my thought of the day, which is to not take your time with loved ones for granted. Whether it’s your mom, dad, sister, brother, husband, wife, children, friends, or extended family – it doesn’t matter what their title is. Try to see them whenever you can. Try to do things with them. Make memories. If we outlive our loved ones, the only thing we have left are the memories we made with them.

If you can’t spend time with them regularly, reach out to them. Call them just to have a conversation and catch up. You’ll never regret making time for the ones you love, and you never know how long they will be in your life.

Lastly, try to express to them how much they mean to you. It can feel weird and vulnerable, but it will be worth it. If you pass away before them, they will know how you felt about them (and vice versa). It’s comforting, even though they are not with you anymore.

So that’s today’s thought of the day. I hope it inspires you to become more connected with others and not take your time for granted with them. I also hope that it makes you want to take action. Because the decisions you make on how you spend your time each day will determine how many memories you can make with others.