growth | The Caleb Barney Collection

Are you justifying your fears?

Stop justifying your fears just so you can stay in your comfort zone. If you do so, you are deliberately holding yourself back, even if it is subconsciously. You give yourself an excuse or you say things like, “well I didn’t really want that anyways,” or, “I have to give up too much to get that,” just to make yourself feel better about not getting what you really want.

In reality, all of the best things in life take work to get. Sometimes, it takes a lot of work. Because if it was easy, everyone would do it.

If you’re OK with taking it easy and not living life to the fullest, that’s OK too. That’s part of the trade-off. But at least be honest with yourself… It’s not because you didn’t really want it, it’s because you didn’t want to have to do what it takes to get it.

Let your past make you better, not bitter

Things don’t always go our way. Sometimes people have wronged you intentionally. Sometimes they’ve wronged you accidentally. Sometimes it could be chalked up to being young and stupid. Other times it could be attributed to them being spiteful, prejudiced, or racist.

No matter what the reason, use your past to benefit you. At the very least, you can say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger…

Find the silver lining in all situations and learn to forgive, but not forget.

Progress, not perfection

If you won’t remember this specific event in a week (let alone in a year or at the end of your life), then stop worrying so much about it. It’s not a big deal. Don’t blow things out of proportion.

So what if you got a B (or C, D, or F) on an assignment? Does that mean that you’ll never succeed in life?

So what that you didn’t get 8 hours of sleep? Does that mean you’re going to be a zombie the next day?

So what if your kids have some chocolate or didn’t eat the most perfectly grown, organic/non-GMO food today? Does that mean that they won’t grow and their health is now in jeopardy?

The point is, we are more resilient than most people think and so are our kids (if we let them). Don’t think that everything has to be perfect, because it won’t be – and you’ll drive yourself crazy trying to make it perfect. Go with the flow. Be nice. Treat others well. Do your best everyday. But be kind to yourself. Understand that the goal should be progress, not perfection.

How to make BETTER decisions FASTER

Work on making BETTER decisions FASTER. If you can quickly grasp concepts, see the big picture, and make sure that your decision aligns with your goals and values, you will go far in life. GREAT leaders can make quick decisions that consistently are the correct decisions (or, at least, mostly correct and move themselves/the team in the right direction).

How can you do this?

1) Practice making decisions quickly on trivial matters. Don’t waste a bunch of time on a decision that doesn’t really matter (like what you’re eating for dinner, what movie you should watch tonight, etc). Practice making small decisions quickly and it will become easier to make bigger decisions quickly. If your decisions come with unintended negative consequences, at least it was over something trivial and you can easily recover from your “mistake.”

2) Be well-read. The more you read about many subjects, the better you can understand and relate concepts. If you have a great base knowledge over many subjects, you should be able to “pick up” a concept quickly. It’s incredible how many concepts overlap.

3) Know who you are. Know what you stand for, what you value, and what your core beliefs are. You should change over the years, but your core values should not. If something doesn’t align with how you believe you should act/behave, then don’t do it. It’s a rules-based system that automatically eliminates certain decisions for you, reducing your choices and making it easier for you to make better decisions quickly.

4) Know what you want/what your goals are. If you know you want six-pack abs, then you probably know you should workout everyday, eat healthy foods, drink plenty of water, and get plenty of sleep. You also probably know that means you shouldn’t binge on pizza and ice cream. When you know what your goals are, it will make it easier for you to make decisions which align with your goals. Make sure you review what it is that you want frequently to keep it top of mind.

Finding your rich life

What is your rich life? Rich doesn’t necessarily mean having a lot of money. It’s having enough money while being happy most days. Do you enjoy what you do every day (or most days)? Do you get to spend time with loved ones? Do you get to play? Find out how you can get to do something that you like doing every day, where it feels “light” to do it.

Why shouldn’t work be fun? I love the quote, “I take the work that I do seriously, but I don’t take myself seriously at all.” You should care about the work that you do. That doesn’t mean that you can’t have fun doing it though. You should not take yourself so seriously though. If you fail or mess up, that’s fine. You should want your kids to see you fail from time to time just so they know that it happens and it’s not the end of the world. But you should also want them to see you rise up and overcome those failures. You cant be kept down unless you chose to not get back up. Nothing can stop you except yourself.