Prioritize what is important to you. Every decision you make has short-term and long-term consequences. Most of the time, if you can do what’s best for the long-term, you will eventually win. Sometimes that means delaying gratification (not doing what is fun/feels good right now). Dave Ramsey calls that maturity.
Tag: growth
The key to success
Knock down/remove as many barriers as possible to achieve success. But make sure you’re the one removing the obstacles and not just letting someone do the hard work for you.
The more barriers you have, the less likely you are to reach your goal. For example, say you want to lose 50 lbs. If you don’t have workout attire, you’re less likely to go…
If you live far away from the gym you chose to be a member…
If you don’t have a support system/someone to hold you accountable…
If you are surrounded by junk food (you have it in your house, you go down the aisle in the store with it, etc.)…
REMOVE BARRIERS.
Attributes
Below is a list of attributes I want for myself and to instill in my children:
Perseverance, optimistic, not easily discouraged/embarrassed, not afraid of failing, mentally and physically tough, setting a goal and working towards it, ok with asking questions, hungry to learn, love competition, focused on the most important next action steps, forward thinking, not procrastinating, curious, willing and able to give effort every day, love and enthusiasm for life, understand big picture concepts, think outside the box, grateful, happy, kind to others
And this is a list I want to avoid:
Complainer, negative, judgmental, rude, entitled, lazy, can’t think for yourself, not willing to try/learn new things
I’m sure there are more items I can add to both lists, but this is the general gist of what I strive for everyday. The other key is to surround yourself with people who share similar values. You become the average of the people you hang out with most. Don’t let it be someone who only brings negative drama to your life.
My biggest fear…is it really what I think?
Many people fear failing, and I know it is one of my biggest fears as well. That’s what I’ve always told myself before, anyways. But after thinking about it more, am I afraid of actually failing or am I afraid of looking like a failure to others? There is a difference…
When you actually fear failing, you’ll often get stuck in “paralysis by analysis” mode, where you procrastinate taking any action for fear that the action you take is the wrong one. The irony is that this fear to fail often keeps you from even trying to get what you want. But if you don’t try it, you guarantee you won’t get it. In that sense, you have ensured failure, just not publicly.
So is it really failure you’re afraid of or is it the perception of failing? Sometimes you are held back from doing something or saying something because you think others will look down on you. Are you ok with asking questions and letting other know that you are not processing the information they’ve given to you? Are you ok with trying something new, with no guarantees of succeeding, if you think others will judge you for it? That’s the difference between being afraid to fail versus being afraid to look like a failure.
Next time you find that you aren’t pursuing a goal or a passion, ask yourself this…What is more important – what other people think of you (when they see you try and fail) or what you think of yourself (never publicly trying something/never “failing” in front of others, but ask never achieving your actual goal)?
Being a boss? Or being a leader
You can be a natural leader, where you inspire others to do their best and help the team reach its goals, without being in a leadership position. You can lead with quiet confidence or be outgoing. There are many styles of leadership, and some styles work better depending on the circumstances. For example, you can have a great wartime leader, but in times of peace, that person’s words or actions may not resonate with those whom they are leading. Or you can have a terrific peacetime leader, but when times get tough, their voices may be too soft to motivate others to believe in the cause.
Regardless of the type of leader you are (or you follow), the best leaders typically find ways to help you grow. They don’t do the work for you, but they help by asking you the right questions and letting you find your way.
Bosses, on the other hand, can be leaders or they can be tyrants. Bosses can still get things done over threat of power or anger, but they don’t win any loyalty from their subordinates. In fact, instead of people going above and beyond, they will often only do the bare minimum for a boss. Other than the intrinsically motivated optimist, why should anyone bust their butt for someone who is always the first to blame others when things go wrong, who takes credit when things go right, and who doesn’t treat their employees with respect?
If you are fortunate enough to be promoted, make sure you work to be the best leader you can be and don’t just be another “boss.”