Tag: happiness

Let your body lead (how to artificially produce confidence)

Act confidently to think confidently. This then feeds itself and turns into a never-ending cycle. It’s like the old adage says… Fake it until you make it.

It’s amazing what your body can trick your mind into believing. You can know what you’re talking about, but if you act meek or shy, if you don’t keep good posture, a smile on your face, or walk tall, if you have a limp handshake and don’t look people in the eyes, you’re not inspiring confidence in yourself. People around you see it and you feel it. It’s tough to get out of that cycle. People will be less likely trust you with big decisions, and if you run into the wrong people, they’ll look to take advantage of your lack of confidence.

Meanwhile, if you act confidently, speaking with purpose (loud, but not too loud; crisp; relatively quickly, but not too fast; with energy and enthusiasm, but not so much as to annoy the other person listening), keep your head up, your shoulders pulled back, look people in the eyes, you dress the part, and you genuinely sound like an expert, you’ll see much more success. People will be drawn to you.

Bottom line: act how you want to feel. Your body will lead the way.

Reading vs experiencing

Reading about something is not the same as experiencing it. A lot can be learned from reading, so this is not trying to discredit reading at all. But being a part of something/experiencing it is completely different than looking at it from the outside-in.

For example, I can read about D-Day, but I will never know what a soldier experienced during that battle. Or I can read about Yellowstone National Park is, but I can only imagine what it’s like to see it in person.

Read often and read broadly. It’s nice to have a good knowledge base of many subjects. But be humble enough to know that just because you’ve read about something doesn’t mean that you truly understand it. Go experience things as often as you can. When it comes to trying something new or going somewhere you’ve never been before, say yes. Because there is no substitute for experience.

Finding your purpose to live a long, meaningful life.

It’s not that life is short; it isn’t. It’s that we waste so much time doing things that we don’t want to be doing.

How can you maximize your enjoyment (play) while also meeting your need to achieve personal goals, contributing to the well-being of others, and not feeling the stresses of modern life?

Finding your purpose
Finding your purpose.

Take the time to fill out this diagram. As you can see, not everything will overlap. It may be very difficult to find your purpose, but if you do, your life will be like a dream come true.

Being present

Enjoy your time in the present. You can’t change the past and if you dwell too much on it, you can fill your head with regret (from negative memories) or longing (from nostalgic memories). But regardless of what you’re thinking about, if you spend too much time on it, you’re not making new memories. Be present so you can strengthen your current relationships and create new, meaningful memories.

Just as you can’t change the past, you also cannot control the future. There are so many variables outside of what you can influence. Focusing too much on outside factors or on things that might happen can cause you to feel a lot of anxiety.

Once again, the key is to return to the present. You can only control the thoughts you tell yourself and actions you take today. And no matter how smart we think we are, nobody knows what tomorrow will bring. Not only that, but we are not guaranteed to be here tomorrow. That’s why you have to balance your actions to maximize living your best life – setting up your future self to succeed, but also enjoying your life today.

Be present. Put things in perspective. It’s important to enjoy life today, to spend time with loved ones, to have regular conversations with friends, and to play a little each day. Life is good as long as you don’t let it overwhelm you.