Your guide to a healthier perspective of life
Learn to forgive yourself. If you mess up, that’s OK. If you keep making the same mistakes, that’s not OK. You need to learn from your mistakes.
Forgive yourself when you mess up because we are all human and we all matter. But if you keep messing up and doing the same thing over and over again, eventually it’s not just a once off. That is a habit that you have formed and you need to get rid of it. Always work to improve yourself.
We all make mistakes – always have and always will. Think back to a time when you were young and impressionable, when you were inexperienced at something…when you wade a mistake, did your teacher/mentor/parent berate you for making a mistake? If they did (and you consistently received this negative feedback), you may still carry some of that baggage with you today. You might be too scared to take any chances at all, for fear of “messing up.” But if you never try anything new because you might make a mistake, you’ll severely limit your growth. You are capable of so much, but you will often have to try and fail many things before building off of those experiences.
If you’re in a position of “power,” whether that’s being an employer, boss, manager, parent, mentor, role model, teacher, coach, etc., make sure you let those around you know that it’s ok to make mistakes! They shouldn’t be happy that they made a mistake and should always try to learn and grow from their mistakes, but despite their best intentions, sometimes they still will slip up. (We all do.)
Make sure you’re creating an environment that knows people have permission to make mistakes, but the obligation to learn from them.
“Believe you can and you’re halfway there.” – Theodore Roosevelt
If you want to achieve great things, the first thing you must do is believe…believe that you can do it! Because if you don’t really think it’s possible, you’ll subconsciously look for reasons why you can’t do it instead of finding ways to do it. You might have to think outside the box to get it. You might have to follow a path someone else has already cleared. But almost assuredly, if it’s a challenging goal, you’re likely to at least stumble along the way. This is why believing that you can do it AND believing that you’re strong enough to overcome any adversity that comes your way is so important. When you inevitability make a mistake, you’ll realize it’s not permanent, and you’ll find a way to move on and grow from it.
Believe in yourself. Make a plan. Take action. Re-evaluate as necessary. Persist through difficulty. And continue to make progress towards your goal(s) every day.
Learn to listen. You can’t listen if you’re talking at the same time as the person who you’re supposedly conversing with. You can’t listen if you’re only thinking about what you’re going to say next. For conversation to be meaningful, you need to talk and listen.
Dr. Gary Chapman (author of The 5 Love Languages) writes that “Listening begins with attitude. If I choose to believe every person I encounter has inherent dignity and value, meaning their thoughts and feelings are important, then I am prepared to listen. If I think the world revolves around me, that my ideas are all that counts, then why should I listen to anyone else? Many people don’t have a communication problem; they have an attitude problem.”
We can all work on improving our attitude! Part of having a good attitude includes being generous (not just with money, but also your time), being optimistic (yet realistic), and loving/caring for others.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you really need it. If you’ve exhausted your resources and have given an honest effort to solve the problem on your own, it’s not only OK to ask a question, but it’s smart to ask for guidance from someone who may be able to help you find the answer you’re looking for. The key word here is guidance though…They should be guiding you, but you still need to put in the legwork to make it happen. You should be actively helping to make it happen and not passively watching someone else do the work for you.