mentor | The Caleb Barney Collection

Leadership and making mistakes…

Give people permission to make mistakes and the obligation to learn from them.

We all make mistakes – always have and always will. Think back to a time when you were young and impressionable, when you were inexperienced at something…when you wade a mistake, did your teacher/mentor/parent berate you for making a mistake? If they did (and you consistently received this negative feedback), you may still carry some of that baggage with you today. You might be too scared to take any chances at all, for fear of “messing up.” But if you never try anything new because you might make a mistake, you’ll severely limit your growth. You are capable of so much, but you will often have to try and fail many things before building off of those experiences.

If you’re in a position of “power,” whether that’s being an employer, boss, manager, parent, mentor, role model, teacher, coach, etc., make sure you let those around you know that it’s ok to make mistakes! They shouldn’t be happy that they made a mistake and should always try to learn and grow from their mistakes, but despite their best intentions, sometimes they still will slip up. (We all do.)

Make sure you’re creating an environment that knows people have permission to make mistakes, but the obligation to learn from them.

5 Rules to succeed at the workplace

1) Be the hardest worker in the room. Get there first, leave there last, and be productive when you’re there. Work when you’re at work.

2) Question everything internally first. If a rule, a way of doing things, or a story doesn’t make sense to you, try to earnestly figure it out and come up with a solution. If you always question an authority figure out loud (and especially if you do it in front of others), it will be viewed as being disrespectful. But if you bring things to their attention when you don’t understand and you do it in private, they can respect that (as long as their ego is in check).

3) Be humble, yet confident. Let your actions and the results speak for you. Keep your head up, put a smile on your face, have good posture/don’t slouch, speak clearly/enunciate, speak loudly but not too loud, look at others in the eyes when you’re talking with them, and keep an open mind to changing/forming new opinions.

4) Don’t engage in gossip unless you are speaking positively about someone else/building them up. Never say something behind someone’s back that you wouldn’t say to their face. If you would say it to their face and it’s a big enough deal to bother you, bring that person aside and talk it out.

5) Stay in your lane, but be aware of what is happening in the lanes around you. Nobody wants someone in another department to butt in and tell them how to do their job. Focus on your tasks and your responsibilities. BUT, have a good understanding of what other departments do, what they do well and what they can improve upon. You don’t need to know how they do what they do, but if you want to rise in the ranks, you should at least know what they do.

Setting an example

“Great dads know that they are setting the example for just about everything in their child’s life. How to handle adversity. How to be a friend. How to treat those less fortunate. How to succeed with humility. How to care for the people you love. How to be a good parent.” – From Daily Dad (the creators of The Daily Stoic)

Think about that everyday. How are you acting? Would you want your kids to see that and emulate you? Are you throwing an adult tantrum when things don’t go your way? Are you pouting? Are you mean?

Show your kids how to act and speak with dignity, how to apologize when they’re wrong, how to stand up for themselves, how to control their emotions. Be the best version of yourself for you, but also for them. Because you are teaching them how to respond in these situations, whether you think they’re looking or not…

Love

“One of the greatest things a father can do for his children is to love their mother,” Howard Hunter said.

It only takes a moment to do, but your kids will remember your words long after you say them and your actions after you do them. It will impart on them how to treat their future spouses.

Do you want your kids to be loving, generous, and grateful? Make sure you try to display that with your actions daily. If you diminish what your spouse says or does, if you treat them poorly or with indifference, or if you don’t show them respect, your kids can pick that up and do the same.

Leading

When you are in a leadership role (and everybody is to one degree or another) be your true self. Don’t try to emulate someone else. If you want to you take bits and pieces from leaders you admire, absolutely feel free to do that. But if you want to just copy someone else, you will never be the best leader. Because at best, you will be a poor man’s version of whoever it is you’re trying to imitate. For example, nobody is a better Abraham Lincoln or Theodore Roosevelt than Abraham Lincoln and Theodore Roosevelt. They were great because they were themselves. They did things as they saw fit. If you try to do exactly as if they would’ve done, you’re going to fall short. It’s best to learn from others, but still implement your own style.