Tag: mindset

How to get ahead

Do you know how to get ahead? Here are a few tips:

1. Try your best in everything you do. Don’t half-ass anything. If you’re going to take the time to do something, you might as well do the best you can. The time is going to pass anyways, so why would you choose to do anything less than your best?

2. Be interested. The more curious you are, the more you’ll enjoy learning. If you’re interested in something, you can spark someone else’s interest as well and have friends take part in the activity too.

3. Don’t think that you’re above something. If you are asked to do something at your current job, then do it. You’re not entitled to anything. And if you don’t have a job but are offered something that most would consider being beneath you in the eyes of others, really weigh your options before saying no. If you need the money, take the job and keep looking for something better. Don’t rely on unemployment or your parents to take care of you when you’re fully capable of doing so yourself.

4. Have a great attitude. There are a lot of things you can’t control, but one thing you can control is your attitude. Choose to be happy. Choose to see the best in every situation and in everybody. Nobody likes being around a complainer.

5. Look for opportunities. Keep your eyes open. Don’t be afraid to think outside the box. Keep learning, planning, practicing, and taking action. Opportunities are all around us if we just look for them.

Finding your rich life

What is your rich life? Rich doesn’t necessarily mean having a lot of money. It’s having enough money while being happy most days. Do you enjoy what you do every day (or most days)? Do you get to spend time with loved ones? Do you get to play? Find out how you can get to do something that you like doing every day, where it feels “light” to do it.

Why shouldn’t work be fun? I love the quote, “I take the work that I do seriously, but I don’t take myself seriously at all.” You should care about the work that you do. That doesn’t mean that you can’t have fun doing it though. You should not take yourself so seriously though. If you fail or mess up, that’s fine. You should want your kids to see you fail from time to time just so they know that it happens and it’s not the end of the world. But you should also want them to see you rise up and overcome those failures. You cant be kept down unless you chose to not get back up. Nothing can stop you except yourself.

Controlling your responses to negative stressors

Everyone feels the same emotions…fear, insecurity, heartache, hunger, tiredness, anger, joy. What separates our role models and heroes from those who we do not look up to is how they respond to those emotions.

If you want to be the best version of yourself, take a look in the mirror. How do you respond under stress? Do you take out your frustrations on others or treat them poorly? Would you want your kids to act like you do when you’re stressed?

If you want to be more like your role model(s) or to become a role model, the first step is to be aware of how you’ve seen others react under stress. Are there people you would like to emulate?

After you’ve seen the responses of others and determined which actions you deem commendable, the next step is to be aware of how you currently react under stress. What behaviors, actions, or words do you say/do that you’re proud of and what do you want to stop doing?

After taking note of what you already do, start monitoring how you’re doing from this point forward. Be strict, but forgiving with yourself. You want to start taking the right actions right now. But if/when you mess up, own your mistakes/actions, apologize if necessary, and move forward.

Cut yourself some slack, especially in the beginning, because it takes a while to form a new habit (of responding appropriately to any/every situation). But remember, if we want to be the best version of ourselves, if we want to be a role model to our kids, if we want to make others around us feel better about themselves, and if we want the world to be a nicer place, it all starts with us. We can’t control what other people think, say, or do, but we can control ourselves. It just takes practice.

The bare minimum

When working a W-2 job as an employee, don’t expect a raise just because you show up to work on time, you don’t take sick days, and you‘be been there for a long time. Showing up to work on time and not missing extra days is the bare minimum of what you should be doing. That’s part of the job! But just showing up doesn’t necessarily mean you’re providing value to your employer. You still have to perform, and that’s what your raise should be for (if you get one). It should be based on merit – how are you “deserving” of a raise? (By the way, I despise the word “deserve”…we are becoming very entitled and often feel we “deserve” things when we really are owed nothing.)

There are a lot of downsides with being an employee, one of which is that someone else gets to determine what you make (whether that’s hourly or salary). But that employer has taken the risk of being an entrepreneur. They are responsible for keeping the business afloat, for always striving to find more customers so that they can pay their employees. If you haven’t put in the legwork and only see the end result of what you think the employer is making, it can seem wrong with how much they’re making with how “little” work they’re currently doing. But that’s the wrong mindset to have. And if you want to do something about it, you have three options: negotiate for higher pay, find another job, or start your own business.

Be so good they can’t ignore you (and prepare for haters along the way)

Haters are a good problem to have. Nobody hates the good ones. They hate the great ones.
“Haters are a good problem to have. Nobody hates the good ones. They hate the great ones.” – Kobe Bryant

Be so good that they can’t ignore you. And know that along the way, you will have detractors. You’ll have people making negative comments or disparaging remarks to try to bring you down to their level. Ignore the critics. Pay no attention to the haters. They are obstacles in your way to greatness.

If you dream big and act on your dreams, people will inevitably say things to you to make you question your decisions.

“Why do you work so hard?”

“I would never want to _____.”

“That sounds miserable.”

Don’t worry about what they say. Live your life and let them worry about living theirs. You’re striving for greatness, not mediocrity. As Tywin Lannister says in Game of Thrones, “A lion doesn’t concern himself with the opinions of sheep.”