Tag: mindset

Being a positive realist

Not everything that happens in life is positive. Yes, you can try to find the silver lining in everything (and you should), but that doesn’t mean that you should ignore the negative.

When you feel pain, suffering, or annoyance, it’s for a reason. Pay attention to that and do something about it. If you can’t do anything about it, there’s no need to get angry or stressed about it. There’s no need to beat yourself up over it or to make yourself feel bad. And there is never a need to have self-pity.

Things happen that we don’t want to happen all the time. We can’t change the past. But we can learn from it and use those experiences to shape our future. Whether we decide to focus on the negative or positive is up to us, but the best choice is to see the whole picture, realize it is what it is, and get to work.

It’s just like the Serenity Prayer says…”God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; Courage to change the things I can; And wisdom to know the difference.”

Today, and from now on, work on being a positive realist. You’re realistic about the situation at hand, but you can find the light in everything.

On holidays

A lot of people love holidays and birthdays. They enjoy gift giving, gift receiving, recognizing others on their special day, or being recognized on their own special day.

As I was thinking about it yesterday (Father’s Day), I realized that I really enjoy the holidays and birthdays too. But I honestly don’t care about receiving gifts or recognition. That’s not my love language. Holidays and birthdays are just another day to me. What I love about the holidays though is having a set day, a reminder, to take some time off from work. It’s almost like a forced break. It’s a scheduled day in our calendar where it’s not only socially acceptable to not work that day, it’s actually encouraged and it’s a little strange to be working.

It’s important for the hard-drivers (the people who are always focused on work, achievement, and improvement) to take some time off. Because too often, we are thinking about what we need to do next, when really we need to just enjoy time with our loved ones – the ones who make our lives worth living.

So, yes…I enjoy holidays too. But it’s not for the reason many think about.

Choose your mood

“Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” – Abraham Lincoln

Have you ever noticed something that triggers one person and puts them in “a mood” for the rest of the day, but a similar event has no affect on a different person? Why is that?

It seems like some people are predisposed to being angry at the smallest things – letting everything around them affect how they’re feeling at that moment. But it really doesn’t have to be that way. In most cases, it only takes a mindset shift to live a happier, less stressful life. Obviously there are things that happen to us that are very serious. Thinking positively doesn’t necessarily make the situation all better, but it’s still the better choice to make rather than dwelling on the negative. Regardless of how do you think about the situation, you probably can’t control those outside events and you can’t change the past. But you can control how you respond to them.

Choose to be happy and see the good in every situation. Why would you want to choose to be anything other than happy?

A quick reminder to not take life too seriously

Unless the events that are happening to you are life-altering such as a birth, a death, a job change, a (fill in the blank)… if it’s something that is a one-time event that can change the rest of your life, then don’t take it too seriously. It’s not that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things. Will one night of poor sleep affect you for the next 10 years of your life? Will one missed work out mean that you are shortening your lifespan? Will one bad performance or bad review kill your career or business? Get into the habit of asking yourself, “will I even remember this happened to me a month from now?” (let alone ten years or more from now).

Of course, if you let these small things happen often enough, they will affect your life. But you don’t need to stress yourself out by overemphasizing the importance of every single event, every meal, every bedtime, or every workout. Do the right thing most of the time, but don’t stress. Everything is going to be ok.