Tag: truth

Why is it that you’re really upset?

If you get upset with somebody’s words, pause and reflect as to why those words are affecting you this way. Is it because there is a hint of truth to them? Or is it because there is no truth at all to them and you feel that it is disrespectful or slanderous towards you?

There can be a fine line between disrespect and tough love. Is that person telling you something you need to be told, even though it’s not how you want to be told? Sometimes, that’s the only way to get through to you… That’s the only way you’ll actually listen. If somebody is too nice or makes it a little too easy and comfortable for you to hear, it never sinks in. It’s a lot easier to brush off. But if somebody tells you a hard truth and you don’t like it, or if they do it in a way that you don’t like, it’s going to get your attention. Sometimes, that’s what is needed. Don’t get mad and stew on it. Try to understand why they said it. If it’s true, do something about it. If you feel it’s inaccurate, talk with the other person and see where they’re coming from.

A “don’t” list of traits…

I think a lot about the traits I admire most – integrity, work ethic, respect, and positivity are just a few. But recently, I thought of the traits that “trigger” me the most. Not surprisingly, they are mostly opposites of what I look for.

For example, if someone is not honest or if they only tell half truths to mislead/deceive people, I immediately feel that I can’t trust them. How do I know they won’t cover up the actual truth just to look good? Or that they won’t tell me something so they can gain/profit from it?

When I see lazy people (employed or not), I don’t want to associate with them. Whether they are lazy when it comes to their work habits, taking care of themselves, etc…I often find that it carries over into other parts of their lives too.

When I see people who are consistently rude, I don’t want to associate with them. Often times they say it’s sarcasm or that they’re telling it like it is, but I feel that’s just an excuse. There’s usually a better way to get your point across.

And when I see people who are always negative, often they’ll call them realists. But what you think, your life will become. It’s almost like a self-fulfilling prophecy. You’re not even giving yourself a chance if you’re not optimistic/positive. A lot of people will think you’re crazy if you have high goals and high expectations. I think that maybe they just set the bar too low and settle for mediocrity.

What’s on your list of traits to avoid?

Being true to yourself

Be true to yourself. Nowadays, people want to become famous just to be famous. It’s not because they’re necessarily striving to be great at anything or known for being excellent at their craft. They sell out – doing or saying things that don’t align with who they really are just to try to get more likes or to make a viral video.

If you are only putting out the content because you want to get as many likes as possible you need to take a look in the mirror. Why are you trying to impress people that you’ve never met and likely never will meet? If the work that you’re putting out into the world is not something you’re proud of, why do it? Don’t do things to impress a random person or say the something on social media because you think it will be accepted by the main stream. You should do, say, and create things because they matter to you.

The world is full of individuals. We are all unique and that’s what makes this such a wonderful place. Be the real you. You may offend some people or turn others off, but the people who like your actions? They’ll like the real you. And you’ll be able to form a deeper bond/connection with them than any of the shallow connections of getting a few likes on a post.

Facing discomfort

If you’re not good at something, stop avoiding it. Charge ahead into it!

It feels uncomfortable to be bad at something, especially when you are used to being average or above average in most things that you care about. But if you keep avoiding that which you are not good at, it will only hide your weakness for so long. Eventually that weakness will be exposed, often times in front of many people (causing even more embarrassment).

It’s best to just face your discomfort and/or your perceived weaknesses head on… Because really, why are you avoiding it if not for either fear of other peoples perceptions or your fear of being uncomfortable?

Knowledge and ignorance

“The greater our knowledge increases the more our ignorance unfolds.” John F. Kennedy

You don’t know what you don’t know. I used to think I was relatively smart, then I began reading more and realized that there is so much I don’t know.

We will never know everything. We can’t even know everything that we think we know, let alone use science, math, and other information/data to break through to understand new answers and technologies.

As long as you remain humble, keep an open mind, and always try to learn something new, you’ll be in a good spot. Don’t talk down to others because you think your idea of “the truth” is more complete than theirs. Over time, you’ll come to realize that your truth today is only a partial truth. It’s your truth, but then there is also the other person’s truth (their perspective of the same event/situation) and the objective truth (what happened, with no thoughts/opinions of why something was said/done, without assigning intent or judgment, etc). And what really plays with your mind is when you realize that your truth today gets twisted/altered so that when you look back at the event in five, ten, or twenty years, you have yet another version of the truth.